Russia Satire

The Cancelling of “sexual athlete” and thinking dog, Joseph Stalin.

A friend of mine just posted a thoughtful piece inspired by Harpal Brar of the CPGB (ML), about how wonderful Joseph Stalin was and how much he is maligned.

There was much in the piece of interest to both historians and psychoanalysts, but I felt a few points needed taking up.

“It is heart-warming to hear Hugo Turner — one of the most eminent and highly-esteemed writers in the world today, and the only ever recipient in the same year of both the Nobel Prize for Politics and the Nobel Prize for Literature — mention the name of that supreme intellectual and strategist, historian and leader of the British masses, Harpal Brar, who surely must rank with Marcelo Ficino and Mme Blavatsky among the foremost thinkers of all time, perhaps even more penetrating than Empedocles or Heliogabulus. It is true that in the UK Ealing by-election of 2001, Harpal — who mobilised the broad swathes of Ealing proletariat to receive a stunning vote of confidence from them, with 921 votes — was nevertheless narrowly defeated by the White Army candidate from Sunshine Radio (Lit Avtar, 5764 votes). Nevertheless, he managed to go on to become the Prime Minister of Britain, with Hardial Bains of the CPB(ML) serving as his Deputy, representing the British peasantry of Essex in a classic worker-peasant bloc. Today, due to Harpal’s unfailing leadership, British troops are fighting alongside the Russians in Mariupol under his direct command on the front line, fighting oiled-up and bare-chested alongside his friend and judo sparring partner, Comrade Putin – although these manifest facts are, totally predictably, literally never mentioned in the lying bourgeois press.

It is sad but inevitable that such a towering figure as Stalin — a brilliant intellect, loyal to his friends, hard-working, supremely good looking and a sexual athlete of the highest order (as attested by Marilyn Monroe in her secret diaries, brutally suppressed by the CIA after her assassination by Mossad agent, Woody Allen) — gets such a bad press literally everywhere on the world, even in Russia, and even from every single person that ever met or knew, or knew of him (other than Hugo Turner, Harpal Brar and Kim Jong Un) to the extent that honest proletarians and the lowliest yak shifters and mill weevils of the Asian Steppes and literally everywhere outside of Ealing and Pyongyang have been alienated from him by the constant slander of the mainstream press, and it is now down to a few honourable senescent maniacs such as Harpal, when they have the strength, to gather to honour the man who turned Russia into a great power on a par with Nazi Germany and imperialist Britain before it mysteriously collapsed overnight under the weight of its own undeniable successes in every conceivable sphere of human endeavour (military, economic, scientific and corrective technology) to be taken over by Luciano Beria, Nicholas Kruschev and Yogi Bear, supported by the arch revisionist, social-imperialist traitors led by Osip Mandelstam, Laika the Dog, and the cast and production crew of Doctor Zhivago. In fact, as has been exclusively revealed in documents of the Central Committee of the CPGB(ML) many times now, if you are not simply a slack-jawed fool taken in by the lies of the West, North, East and South, and can still recognise the patently obvious facts they try to hide from you, then it is clear that Comrade Stalin, that great friend and ally of the world, protector of the weary and thinking-dog for the weak of mind, is still alive, despite the efforts of the Trotskyist-Bukharinitee wreckers, and safely ensconced in his base on большая конфетная гора in the Urals, ’cancelled’ like other heroes of the proletarian movement, such as J K Rowling and the Orcs of Slytherin, by the hypocrites of the Western media but still ruling Russia successfully, tenderly managing his vast collection of Soviet Action-Man figures based on Stakhanov and the Heroes of Labour… but the press are simply lying about it. HAVE THEY NO SHAME!

Of course, you will never hear any of this mentioned in the mainstream media or anywhere else outside the internal bulletins of the Communist Party of Great Britain (Marxist Leninist, Ealing Branch), but these are the FACTS, and if Stalin taught us anything, it is that we should stick to the FACTS.”

Comrade Stalin has inspired many artists, poets and cancel culture advocates.

By Andy Wilson … dedicated to all those continuing the struggle on большая конфетная гора.

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